Funny Jokes & Quotes

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Funny Jokes



Funny Jokes

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Funny Jokes

Safe to swim here?
While sports fishing off the Florida coast, a tourist capsized his boat. He could swim, but his fear of alligators kept him clinging to the overturned craft. Spotting and old beachcomber standing on the shore, the tourist shouted,'Are there any gators around here?!' 'Naw,' the man hollered back, 'they ain't been around for years!' 'Feeling safe, the tourist started swimming leisurely toward the shore. About halfway there he asked the guy,'How'd you get rid of the gators?' 'We didn't do nothin',' the beachcomber said. 'The sharks got 'em.'



Top 10 Reasons Why Hurricane Season is Like Christmas
Top Ten Reasons Hurricane Season is Like Christmas 10. Decorating the house (boarding up windows) 9. Dragging out boxes that haven't been used since last season (campinggear, flashlights) 8. Last minute shopping in crowded stores 7. Regular TV shows pre-empted for 'specials' 6. Family coming to stay with you 5. Family and friends from out-of-state calling 4. Buying food you don't normally buy ... and in large quantities 3. Days off from work 2. Candles And the number one reason Hurricane Season is like Christmas ... 1. At some point you know you're going to have a tree in your house!